Previous blog

6:04 PM
I've moved :)
Miss y'all!
9:58 AM


5:04 AM
I am way too hormonal today. Maybe I should get some sleep.
3:56 AM
I don’t know but
I think maybe I'm
Fallin’ for you
Dropping so quickly
Maybe I should keep this to myself
Waiting ’til I know you better

I am trying not to tell you
But I want to
I’m scared of what you’ll say
So I’m hiding what I’m feeling
But I’m tired of holding this inside my head

As I’m standing here
And you hold my hand
Pull me towards you
And we start to dance
All around us I see nobody

Here in silence
It’s just you and me
I’m trying not to tell you
But I want to
I’m scared of what you’ll say
So I’m hiding what I’m feeling
But I’m tired of holding this inside my head

Oh I just can’t take it
My heart is racing
The emotions keep spinning out
I’ve been spending all my time
Just thinking about ya
I don’t know what to do
I think I’m fallin’ for you

I want you all around me
And now I just can’t hide it
I’m fallin’ for you

illusion yo.
4:10 AM


10:20 AM
I dreamt about you.

And I have a secret too. This isn't the first time.


Shit
IM LATE FOR WORK
7:31 PM
MY DOG HAD A BAD DREAM JUST NOW. HE WAS SHAKING IN HIS SLEEP. HAHAHA. PROBABLY HE DREAMT THAT I BEAT HIM IN ANOTHER ROUND OF EYE STARING CONTEST. HOW VERY CUTE! ^^
8:55 AM


6:48 PM
♥ ☮ & ♥ says:
* sobored

Hazel.N HwangHyeMin says:
*lol *i'm cooking noodles!!!
*you of course bored la
*nothing to do

♥ ☮ & ♥ says:
*i just cooked and finished my instant pasta *yums*
*yeah imsobored
*i played this staring contest game with my dog just now
*we stared at each other and it lasted about 8 seconds
*and i won 2 times
*but he beat me like, 5 or six times
*f damn he is a pro now

Hazel.N HwangHyeMin says:
*LOL
*does he even know you both are playing this
*-.-
*you are so funny

♥ ☮ & ♥ says:
*of course he knows
*we are telepathic yknow
*:) hehe

Left house in a rush this morning and forgets about my cell and ipod which was still charging from last night. I can live a day, or even days without my phone but absolutely not my ipod. Forget nicotine or alcohol, the latest drug of choice is one we all have unlimited legal access to: technology. I AM ADDICTED TO MY IPOD. When I don't have my ipod with me, I get bored easily and I feel... Naked.. Yes, naked. Naked and bored and helpless:( Oh well..

/PS: Mommy bought me 2 kinder joy eggs tday. HAPPY MUCH. But I still prefer the old kinder surprise though.. No real reason, its just personal preference i guess. Let's hope I get some toys which I'll know how to assemble them together. Because I'm really bad at assembling tiny figurines, or toys whatever.

XOXO
4:44 PM
Sagittarius and Friendship:

Sagittarius make excellent friends because of their encouraging, positive nature and their kind heart that will do anything to make sure the friend is happy. They do not expect favors in return, their kindness is selfless. They do not interfere with other people's plans and they are never possessive or jealous. They treat others the way they want to be treated and life life based on a 'live and let live' policy, this makes them so agreeable. Sagittarius are excellent conversationalists with a good sense of humor, sometimes their humor is the raw truth, but these people speak their mind and don't hold anything back. What they say is what they mean, Sagittarius do not like mind games, it holds them back trying to figure out what is meant, they like straightforwardness and expect it in return. Sagittarius are known for saying the 'painful truth', but on the other hand, people know that they can trust what they say because they always say what is real. A Sagittarius never hides anything. Sagittarius are very likeable people. The only people that might not get along with them are people that live by a daily agenda with a highly structured, organized life. They are likely to always be running late and miss a date, but this is only because they are so forward thinking that they forget about the present. Tolerance is required, Sagittarius does not do these things on purpose, this is just who they are. If you understand this and accept this, having a Sagittarius in your life will make the sun shine a lot brighter.

Did they say that saggis make excellent friends and are very likeable people? Hell yeah exactly right and spot on! *BEAMS* Hahaha. I need to get more candles. And I'm late for my dinner date. Again..

BYE!
9:58 PM
Listening to the song we used to sing,
12:10 AM
I found him on facebook.




Hey, how are you?
Hope everything's going good for you:)
1:25 AM

5:17 PM
Sigh I wasn't paying attention and I took a digger when I tripped on the crack in the pavement while walking my dog. I can't believe I fell flat on my face. Ouch.

I'm gonna go meet J for dinner and I am still here blogging.
He's always late anyway, i'll let him wait this time!!
12:22 AM
Happy birthday CL(:

I love cyber stalking you btw!
11:29 PM
I need to release some pent up anger or I might go crazy.

I've dealt with other minor crimes in the past, but never anything that so violated my personal space and psyche!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The items stolen included my laptop, my yak pak laptop case, thumbdrive, ipod usb cable, and my BRAND NEW USB MODEM. My life was encapsulated in that 13 inch screen laptop. I've been in school for quite a while now and all my work/assignments was suddenly gone -- every paper, every report, every shred of anything related to my research and studies. The loss of my school-related stuff was huge, but a lot of my personal life was also archived on that laptop:( I had all my photos, calendars, photos, songs, videos and contact lists on that computer as well as a bunch of more quirky and obsessive things that helped me feel like I had a life and an existence (a record of every menstrual cycle for the last one year, every love letter I'd ever written, an outline for a cheesy romance novel, an ongoing list of essay ideas I could use when I was finally done with school and hell, my passwords).

I felt like a huge part of me was taken away. I'm seriously f depressed now, the feeling of having data loss is terrible and heart breaking. I've tried different approaches in dealing with this. I tried to constantly remind myself that my loss was minuscule compared to what victims of the jakarta earthquake or war, or genocide, or natural disaster face every day. I tried to be zen about it by considering the meaning of my attachment to material possessions. My new age tactic now was trying to convince myself that fresh, new beginnings can be wonderful things and sometimes you have to wipe the slate clean (literally) in order to see different paths. But nothing has really worked.

At best this f experience has been a huge inconvenience for someone like me, as am trying to finish a dissertation and my other assignments and at worst it's really shaken up my sense of being in this way that part of me finds profound and another part of me finds trivial and petty. While I've been able to recover most of what I need to continue on with my dissertation, the reality is that there's a huge volume of things I'll never get back and I still feel like a chunk of me is gone forever. My friends and colleagues have been sympathetic, but no one I know has had anything like this happen to them. I get the sense that they don't truly understand what I'm dealing with mentally and emotionally..

I want this loss to stop hanging over me like a dark cloud. I have learnt that it wasn't such a good idea to centralize my life on something so portable. Now I won't be able periodically to look through my work anymore and remind myself that I did accomplish something during my school existence that has had a few highs and an awful lot of lows. I know all these things. What I don't know is how to let go and move on. How to stop feeling like a part of me is gone rather than just a lot of files and documents??!!!! How can I re-conceptualize this experience in a way that allows me to fill in what has become, (without sounding too melodramatic) a gaping hole in my being?

Sigh.
You have made me cried so hard, I hope you will have fun with my laptop you $%#?#$%$%$&!!! (You wore a green spag top with a shawl and I see your mane is short) *ROAR*
9:31 AM
Now, I can't stop crying after watching this.


11:53 PM
HI, APPARENTLY MY DAD SAYS MY TATTOO BEAR THE RESEMBLANCE TO SINGAPORE'S PAP TRADEMARK.
DAD, SERIOUSLY.


11:33 PM

8:43 PM


8:30 PM
♥KELLLYY LEARNS TO ROCK says:
*omg hazelnut
* they look so sweet together!
*did you watch it?

Hazel.N HwangHyeMin says:
*yeah
*when you have your wedding, i will be your bridemaid!

Awww silly girl..
(L)♥
6:53 PM
Please excuse my daughter from school, as she was suffering from amoebic meningitis and was sent by our doctor to the hospital, where it was discovered that she had acute, second stage osteoporosis. They then had to operate to remove her bloated appendix, by request of her dentist. This all occurred shortly after the tragic, teeth-alignment related death of her Grandpa's Uncle's Nephew's Cousin's Fourth Second Cousin's Father's Brother-in-law's Mother's Ex-boyfriend's Sister's Aunty's Great-grandchild named Joe. My child most certainly was not on vacation or skipping school, and may I say how dare you for even considering that.

Such is the wonderment of forgery.
Now i need a homework-doer(!)

P/SS: SCOFFIE BOUGHT NEW WII GAMES! SHARING IS CARING SCOFIELD!!
Tell me you bought tony hawk ride or will fit plus preeetttty pleaseeee!
10:14 PM
I am BLATANTLY not finishing up on the other half of today’s workload. I am so screwing myself over. *yawnsandrubseyes*

And my room is in a even messier state right now, holy shitttttt.
I need help desperately.

P/S: Get well soon people:) Or I'll have nobody elses' to play with): (wii, tennis and movie marathon!!)
4:01 AM
I just woke up looking like… a person who just woke up. Haha, sorry if it doesn't make any sense at all. I think i have a problem putting my thoughts into words right now.

I dreamt of Grandmere just now. It was such a nice dream:)
I really need to start spending some time with her..
I miss you ma-ma:(

Get well soon scoffie! *hugs*
6:37 PM

8:21 AM
BF: Cookies +milk = Happy day!



12:43 AM


3:16 AM
Make breakfasts and watch DVDs with me on saturdays.
2:42 AM
I am amazed at the talent I have in cyber stalking.
11:11 AM

10:23 PM


10:14 PM
What's wrong, what's getting you down
Is it something I might have said?
You're walking around
With your head to the ground
And your eyes are watery red

I know you've been through rough times
Kicked around, thrown to the ground
But you've always been the strong one
So don't tell me that nobody gets you
'Cause I'm standing in your corner
Knocking at Your door
You don't have to be alone

Just call my name
Let me be an answer
'Cause it hurts me to see you this way
I wanna ease your pain
Help me understand
Let me be your shelter my friend

We share a bond
You and I we belong
We're like coffee and morning trains
You strip my defenses
I catch your pretenses
The same blood runs through our veins
I swore I'd be your lifeline
Made a vow that I'd surround you with love at every milestone
I'll listen when nobody gets you
I'm still standing in your corner
Waiting by your door
You don't have to be alone

It was not too long ago
You sought to understand
You helped me mend
Remember when
So promise me you'll

Call my name
Let me be an answer
'Cause it hurts me to see you this way
I wanna ease your pain
Help me understand
Let my be your shelter my friend

Cheer up Hazelnut:) Kelmond is ALWAYS here!
11:48 PM
I feel like Starbucks. MAJORLY.
I also feel like throwing the test. MAJORLY.

Hello world, It's 11.42PM and I have not had ANY work done. *groans* I have a TON of readings to do, plus HMC revision, before I call it a day. Unfortunately, I am more likely to spend the next half an hour reading my book which is due tmr. I've definitely caught the reading bug again. Too bad HMC lies on a different strain of bacteria. One that I have not and may NEVER injest into my system.

Who wants to go to ION/FEP or something? Any day after my stupid, stupid exam works fine. Okay, excluding Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays. I need funness and laughter and joy. Oh. and world peace. Actually, who wants to pop me a sleeping pill. I think I could use 100 years of sleep until Prince Charming wakes me.

Had dinner with my CELESTE today. Awesomeawesome :)
CAN'T WAIT FOR NEXT SUNDAYXXZZZZ!!

I'm tired. I want to flop down and be lazy and babied for a while.
So goodnightsleeptight people :)
2:39 AM
I just had the realisation that I’ve been stopping myself from blogging recently. I’ve been too busy, too tired, too braindead, yes, but I’ve also been clamping down on my urge to blog. I’m not really sure why either. Oh well. 6 more days to exams, I'm getting the jitters already. Wish me luck, goodnightsleeptight all :)
10:25 PM
Burden says:
*jimmy tomorrow onsxzxzxzx again
*reply asap dont mia me
*hurry
*hurry
*hurry
*later I spam you
*hurry reply me ah
*hurry


:)
Had dinner, but is watching the food network and is hungry again.
2:14 AM
Wait for the person who pursues you, the one who will make an ordinary moment seem magical, the kind of person who brings out the best in you and makes you want to be a better person. Wait for the person who will be your best friend, the only person who will drop everything to be with you at any time no matter what the circumstances. Wait for the person who makes you smile like no one else and when they smile you know they need you. Wait for the person who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweat and a t-shirt, but appreciates it when you get dressed up for them. Most of all wait for the person who will put you at the center of their universe, because that’s where you belong. And if you happen to be that person, text me.

Sometimes there is so much negativity radiating out from me, I feel sorry for those around me :(
11:23 PM
i will move to somewhere with dreams. a place where its cold all year round. and i will live in a quaint cottage, planted among stark white snow. i will raise a fire everyday to keep warm. i will sit in an elegant armchair, my feet propped up on a stool, reading my favourite book. i will have a beautiful husky lazing by my side.

and i will feel contentment like nothing else.

one day.
3:48 PM
And after all that, however long all that may be, you’ll go somewhere new. And you’ll meet people that make you feel worthwhile again. And little pieces of your soul will finally come back. And all that fuzzy stuff, those years of your life that you wasted, that will eventually begin to fade.

-The Holiday
2:02 PM
Third day hiatus.
Sitting around in my room trying to motivate myself to do my readings. Exam's in two weeks time.

I think my asthma's med is making me sick. My headaches, they are killing me.

I should totally be studying right now.
11:15 PM
I used to always want to hang out.
But we never talk any more, even when we kind-of do.
Now, I'm just not interested.
10:18 PM
I think I'm going to give up on mobile phones. My samsung omnia, which my dad purchased a mere few months ago for me, just got stolennnnnn:( booohooohoooo :'(

I feel extremely pissed off that some little fucker who probably hasn't earnt a penny his (or her) whole life is gonna profit from the sale of my phone or could use it for the rest of their lives.

I am grateful they didn't steal my wallet. But still. Bastards.

Phone jackers, WATCH OUT >:'(
MY BFF IS A POLICEMAN!
3:33 AM

2:35 AM
Bad case of monday blues, perhaps?

I don't know what's wrong with me. Really. There's nothing particularly wrong with my life, I just feel so wrong inside. I don't really like myself very much now. I'm moody, I'm impatient. I'm not a very good friend and I'm pretty much the world's most horrible daughter given how I seem to get all kinds of impatient and annoyed and just downright repugnant. And my parents puts up with it and my dad is a billion times more patient than I am, which makes me feel even worse.

I'm just in a perpetual state of GROUCH and I hate it, and I don't know why I keep doing it. I've been crying so much lately and I don't know why. I want to be happy, I do. I don't know why it's become so hard.

And I hate being so whiny. And feeling so unsettled and just a billion kinds of absolute wrong-ity. I don't know what to do any more.

Because I felt out of sorts, I ended up doing my quiet time and I kind of like this quote:
"That you are not alone, for I am here with you"

And I think that comforts me so much more than "you are pms-ing, stressed and depressed."

Goodnight people.
1:36 PM

1:29 AM

i should really try staying offline for a week
i have a feeling i'd get a lot more done.

and my hair is in a really bad mood today..

highlights of today: bussed home from vivo with Celeste today:) my long tedious journey bus ride wasn't that arid and dry with you to talk to! hehe i (L) you C!

i want to be surprised. i want to see beauty in things people have forgotten how to see. and if there's something i got reminded about today, it's that you can always be happy. it took a bus ride to show me that.

much love.

Labels: i believe it was a tuesday when i caught your eye

Saturday, August 22, 2009

12:53 AM

I hate planning stuff, because I get psychotic when things don't go according to plan, but I'm timetabling all my commitments.. and you know what? There's no time left over. Or hardly any.

I really want to go to Ikea, and botanic gardens (with Celeste, SKL, Elaine, min ect). And stargazing. and the BEACH. I just wanna have non-study related fun. Or non-thinking fun, really.

I should be writing about something more substantial, but to be honest, homework seems to be piling up. -groans- With work commitments and school commitments and keeping up with the (very few) friends I do have, I've got my work cut out for me.

On happier notes I'm going to get back into my noticeboard hobby, except this time, I'll be decorating medium-sized square pieces of stiff cardboard (preferably corrugated) instead. I figured they're easier to carry around as compared to noticeboards, and I can merely peel them off the wall and move them if I have to move out, instead of tearing all the paper-thin posters when I try to remove them. Hehe I shall start shopping at art friend tmr :)

OH Beyonce and the BEPeas coming on the 26th of sept. Does anyone wanna come with me? *pleading* SOMEONE. ANYONE. So I can book tickets! (jimmy choo! I'm looking at you!!)

Friday, August 21, 2009

2:12 PM

Guess what? I want green tea mochi ice cream, florida orange juice, to go to sentosa with rya, to watch The proposal, lancer(beams), grandmere, to swim, and some new music to listen to. Learn photography/guitar (and someone to teach me), More red envelopes, Starbucks, cold rock ice cream, frolick (again) a long bubble bath, a black leather jacket, a new denim corset and a pair of vintage earrings. Or studs, really. Something blue or red. Drown me in materialism anytime.

And fixing my calender. I'm all busied up this week. And next week (already?!?!) for that matter. I'm getting tired and fidgety, e.v.e.r.y.d.a.y. I need some excitement. A change in routine maybe. I want life to surprise me. Something to make me sit up and take notice. I think I got bored last semester, and wanted drama. And i got it. So maybe I shouldn't be asking for it now. Life has a way of taking me at my word.

I should really write more substantive posts, but I'm rather full and sleepy.


I AM ALSO BROKE.
and i really hope today's a good day, because tomorrow's my study plus working day. So tomorrow WILL be crappy as.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

2:56 AM

Jack- says:
*oh my the insomnia is killing me

♥Sippin on a juice box and sand between our toes, says:
*hahaha you make it seem like im causing you insomnia

Jack- says:
*lol
*ure a contributing factor
*i hunted for your name in my msn during my work time
*and rush home to hunt for u again

Hi, I dropped my stylus tday.

How awesome, I know :)

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

12:55 AM

i think today is my verision of a bad day.

i lost my freaking school ez link card, AGAINNNNNNN WTF

and i might have pissed off a few people;

i just cannot see the day having its turning point, sigh:(

i am gonna hit the sack now, practically asleep on my feet as it is.

hello there eye-candy

i hope it's gonna make you notice.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

9:52 PM

Can't wait to get home
Baby dial your number
Can you pick up the phone?
Cause I wanna holla
Daydreaming 'bout you all day
In school can't concentrate
Wanna have your voice in my ear
'Til mama comes and say its too late
When the lights are on outside
Wish there was somewhere to hide
Cause I just don't want to say goodbye


TSK:)

Thursday, July 23, 2009

8:59 PM

I would love to .. Curl up in a big comfy armchair and read my newly-bought novel.
I would love to .. Snuggle up with ash stymest (my imagery beau) watching Harpers Isand.
I would love to .. Hug an oversized pillow and chat on the phone with my best friend.
I would love to .. Lie on the beach and soak up some sun.
I would love to .. Attempt to lick my Ben & Jerry's without a spoon faster than it can melt.
I would love to .. NOT gain any weight.

Blogger is so much safer then my organizer, but yet my organizer feels safer. I can't quite put my thoughts and opinions into words right now.

Nah, Thoughts are meant to be kept as thoughts. I love the way things are right now. It's just me and my organizer. Just me and my organizer. It's just me and my organizer.......... I love my organizer.... MY ORGANIZERRRRrrrrrrrrr..................

If anyone ever opens it and reads it, I'll be so embarrassed. I think I might even die.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

6:44 PM

To not be comfortable in your own skin, is the worst curse.

1:36 AM

I totally dig my new blog skin *beams*
So people, have some originality or at least have the capacity to act/write/think independently and stop ripping off my stuff. Because it's really vexatious and damn annoying. I'm gonna keep this blog private.

Nothing much to update on. Life has been pretty hectic recently. I lack sleep bad and it's probably because of school and work, presentations after presentations. Believe me when I say I'm good at screwing things up. I am so good at it, it has become one of my strongest point. My dad calls it -a habitual blunderer.

Ugh and I can't stop spending money. Is it just me, or does every girls seem to have the same issue? Sigh. Very soon, my bank account will be left with -negative numbers.

One may think we're alright.
But we need pills to sleep at night.

Time to crash.

Goodnightsleeptight people:)